1 . The introduction: An empath becomes attracted to a narcissist. Loving deeply and unconditionally, the empath feels fulfilled even though the narcissist is not playing an equal part in the relationship. Feeling satisfied, the empath believes their love is reciprocated simply because of the narcissist’s presence.
2. Believing they’ve found a once-in-a-lifetime love, the empath invest more. The narcissist affirms this, creating an illusion that what is happening is “special”, leading the empath to bond even stronger.
3. Occasionally, the narcissist seems to want the relationship as much as the empath, when what they actually want is someone to invest as much time and energy into them as possible.
4. Time passes. The narcissist continues to feel stronger, while the empath slowly drains. Using backhanded statements, the narcissist will continue to erode the empath’s confidence in their own abilities. Taking over anything which symbolizes control, the narcissist will continue to reinforce that the empath “needs” this relationship.
5. For the empath, the relationship has become their entire life. From the love in their hearts, they want the best for the narcissist. Assuming the role of being victimized by their past, the narcissists continue to require more and more from the empath.
6. Believing that their deepest hurts are the same, the empath continues to pour love into the relationship unaware that it’s actually feeding the narcissist’s problems.
7. The relationship continues to become more focused on the narcissist’s needs. Slowly realizing this, the empath begins to stand up for their own needs — no matter how unsuccessful this may be.
8. As the empath continues to invest more of themselves in the relationship, the narcissist feels more and more control. As long as the narcissist is pleased, the relationship is assumed to be “working well”.
9. The empath finally must speak out. Often called “selfish” for doing so, the narcissist uses wordplay to reassert control over the emotional content of the relationship.
10. Seeking more attention, the narcissist may begin courting new partners, traveling extensively, or seeking greater recognition at work.
11. When the breaking point is finally reached, the empath is called “crazy” for the strength of their emotions. By dismissing their deeper needs, the narcissist re-asserts their dominance in the relationship.
12. Confusion sets in for the empath, and they begin to blame themselves for the narcissist’s reactions.
13. The empath doesn’t understand that they’re being manipulated; they still see only their love for their partner. No matter how many friends say otherwise, they’re still unable to see the destructive behavior of the narcissist.
14. Trying to speak from their heart, the empath will communicate truthfully with the narcissist, who will dismiss their behavior and pass the blame onto others.
15. In spite of the feelings of confusion and hurt, the empath will begin to understand the need to change their own way of being. This begins a process of transformation.
16. Being naturally inclined towards being a healer, the empath will draw on their inner strength to help others — and, eventually, themselves.
17. Realizing a sad truth, the empath comes to see that not everyone will be capable of receiving their love and affection. Some people in the world seek only to take from others, and this is a foreign concept to the naturally giving empath.
18. This awakening to the truth will be painful, but the empath will continue to move forward with their own healing and learning processes.
19. The narcissist will assume innocence in all matters, and not pay any respect to the love and care that was given them by the empath. Further walking their own path, they may move further into depression and disconnection.
20. The narcissist will move on to find another victim, another person to feed off of.
21. The empath will have learned, and grown — using their pain as the catalyst for a new phase of life.
Check out the article that inspired this one here